Look the part. Please!

Okay, so last night I go into my local GNC to stock up on my illegal steroids. (Just kidding but the NO2 and CE2 combo seems to be working, I hope.) And the woman that is there every time I go in is working the register. She is the nicest person I’ve ever met. Very helpful and can usually answer any questions I have about a product. Only problem I have is that she looks like she hasn’t done a healthy thing for her body in years. Okay, she has a sweet looking tan, but other than that it’s not all that good. Now I’ll be open and give her the benefit of the doubt and go along with the line of reasoning that maybe she is doing good things for her body and health and she is looking very good compared to where she was say, 5 years ago, but I’ve been going in there for a couple years now and I see no change. See here is where I get lost about this. If I am going to a health store to purchase supplements to make me look better and fit, I want the illusion that the money I'm throwing in the toilet is actually going to make me look like a pro body builder. Not just a poor schmuk throwing his money away. Money that could be spent in Victoria’s Secret!

Which leads me to the rest of my evening, with GNC bag in hand I head across the concourse to the Vic Sec store. Thanks to a wonderful promo from them I can go in and pick up a free pair of panties for my wife. Of course being the conniving bastards that they are, they know I can’t get away with just picking up the free pair, oh no, I have to buy a matching bra otherwise the wife will never wear them. It all has to match incase you aren’t aware. Anyway, the real reason for this post, it’s all about looking the part. So I walk in and there are three women in the back of the store, two are obviously shopping, but the other is all in black and wearing a head scarf. I'm thinking, okay so Miss Muslim wears Vic Sec underneath. That’s cool then I have that momentary thought all men have, I wonder if it matches her outfit and then...is it a thong? But, then I think, wait a minute, she is working here! Isn't that against the rules of Islam? How can she be so devout that she wears a hajib and yet still be able to work in the most obvious outlet of American decadence? It’s clearly one of those, WTF moments. Is that allowed? Well I was so confused about that juxtaposition that I had to find a different saleslady to help me out.
As it was, those conniving bastards knew exactly what they were doing, not only did I purchase a matching bra, I bought a second pair of panties and I renewed my Angels card. Which I found out the wife can also use at Bath and Body Works, and all this before a yell-fest, i.e., meeting, at the fire department.